The Goodbye Routine
Saying goodbye at school can be hard for you and your child, but it doesn’t need to be. Children can get stressed or grief-stricken when parents are about to leave, but they’ll soon learn the drill! It’s delightful to see them eventually zoom onto the playground the second you step through the gate. Here are some useful ways to set up a positive goodbye routine with your child:
Introduce them to the teachers and staff at HPM. Make sure you have had the chance to say hello and introduce yourself and your child to some of our wonderful teachers. Helping facilitate trust between your child and our staff members will help them be more comfortable during the first few days of school.
Have a daily routine. Asking your child how they want to say goodbye will help provide them with a strong signal that is time for you to leave. Some students high-five, some have a set number of kisses, and some even run to the rock in the corner to say goodbye. This routine is not only valuable for your child to confidently say goodbye, but to also know that you are going to return and do it all again tomorrow.
Tell them you will be back. Lots of children just want confirmation that you will be coming back. As you leave saying something like, “I’ll see you this afternoon” or “Mom will be back later” will help ease separation anxiety in your child. The night before school starts you can talk to them about school and what it’s going to be like. You can say something like, “Tomorrow we are going to take you to Hyde Park Montessori, your new school. You’ll have lots of fun on the playground, eat lunch, take a nap, and then in the afternoon I will come and pick you up!”
Expect some emotional moments. If your child starts to cry it is important to still complete your goodbye routine. Ask for help from one of us if your child is clinging. You can make eye contact with a teacher and we will come to you. Don’t try to sneak away, and don’t wait for your child to feel better before you leave – this just prolongs the agony. Do feel free to phone when you get to work, and we’ll tell you how he or she is doing now – usually the tears quickly resolve.
Homework:
Would it be helpful to discuss school the night before it starts with your child? Ask them what they are excited about. Tell them the general outline of the day.
Set up your goodbye routine at home. Before school starts do your goodbye routine when you leave for work, go to the grocery store, go on a date, etc.
By the first day of school, you and your child should have met their teacher. Before you start your goodbye routine, say hello to your teacher with your child.